I wish I WERE A GIRL

M.O.Miesse, 9th- Washington D.C.
​I wish I were a girl
All the time I think about it
That’s a lie, mostly only at night when I’m alone.
I wish a had a smaller face and more petite body,
Even just if my features were more elegant and feminine
I wish I had long luscious hair that went down to my knees
And I wish I was a few inches shorter, short enough to be generally short for a guy but still tall for a woman.
I wish I could pull off wearing dresses that fit my frame nicely and highlighting my features
I wish I wouldn’t be called he or him 
And I wish people wouldn’t make a big deal of me wearing makeup
Saying “look at that guy, he’s so weird” or even “look at him, he’s so brave
And I wish I had breasts, filling up my empty, ugly chest.
I wish I was born in the right body, 
I wish there wouldn’t always be something off or different about me expressing my feminine self
And I wish I didn’t have to think about going through the transition phase, wondering if I will be judged or thought of differently as I go through that challenging process.
But sadly none of these wishes will become true,
I’ll never be able to wear dresses and have hair down to my knees without it seeming off
I’ll never have the smaller feminine face that I’ve dreamed of
And I’ll never be quite right, there will always be something slightly wrong
And correcting that will always be a long process that won’t fully work
Because I was born in the wrong body, and it will never be exactly right.